Most of our starches and smudges come from childhood. Children (1 month to 6 yrs old) experience reality differently than adults. They experience it more clearly, because they don’t have all of the scratches and smudges adults have. Unfortunately it is the mucked up adults of the world that muck up the kids, and the never ending cycle goes on for eternity. It does have to though!

Children are quite fragile, some more than others. Since children experience life less mucked up they truly feel with their emotions. This means that it doesn’t take a physical act or words to create a scratch on their “window into the world”.

The following is something I saw during a real session.

The man having the session was about 38. He was having issues with his wife and some physical ailments. To make a long story short, during the session he recalls being 3 years old sitting at the kitchen table eating some cereal. His mom had just come home from the hospital with his new sister. Without any words from his mother, he would sense in watching her that she was stressed and having a hard time coping. This is the amazing part, in an act of love that happened unconsciously for the most part, he vowed to himself not ask for anything from her so he wouldn’t add to her stress. On a more unconscious level he took on the perception that “women are weak.” So 35 years later he finds himself in a relationship where he feels he has to take care of his wife and he can’t ask for what he needs. Eventually this mental/emotional issue manifested a real physical ailment.

With all the scratches and smudges on our ‘window to the world’ it is very easy to look out and say he, she or they “Did it to me.” or is “Doing it to me.” To a certain degree that may be true, but that is where forgiveness comes in. Whether it is from the past or the present, pointing the fingers at others prevents us from being able to look within and see our part in it. If we continually look out “there” as our source of discomfort we will never do the inner work that needs to be done in order to get rid of the old junk that is messing up our lives.

If your are not welling address the old stuff your are not ready to get better and that is okay. Just know true freedom comes from inside not outside.

I don’t know of anyone that has had a perfect childhood or life for that matter.

I think every parent did or does the best they can. You know, they had their own perceptions, beliefs and expectations to contend with that interfered with their ability to see and live life clearly. Whether it was an alcoholic father or angry mother their dirty windows lead to those behaviors.

Lets face it we are all human and we make mistakes.